Whose life are you living: your own or your........

Whose life are you living: your own or your........

Tomorrow’s topic could be: whose life are you living your own or your........

peers i.e. if they get engaged do you find yourself feeling like you have to keep pace, with their life choices only to find out later your life is now on the wrong course because panic struck you years earlier about your own life so you copied them. So whose life are you living: yours or somebody else's?

Recently I have asked a friend of mine I encountered to challenge me and pick a topic for me to write about. And my new friend was willing and kind enough to oblige! J The above paragraph is what he came up with and I took the bull by the horns and jumped on the wagon and begin my writing and typing away…..

Here is what my solution to his posing question/statement sounds like:

THIS Topic is so common that every single one of us has been there and done that at least once!

First and foremost, you are not alone and we all have gone through this stage of life. And the people after us will feel the same ‘stuckness’, too.

So let us throw the worry habit right out of the window…… shall we?

How to go about solving this challenge?

The main and the most important point in understanding the whole issue is by beginning to get to know yourself.

Yes, Yourself! J

If you don't know who you are, how can you find someone to love you as you are?

Consider this: Just only the fact that you have ‘this’ sitting on your mind must have obviously tell you that you may be doing something that you are either not fully committed to doing, not sure of, not really willing to go full on.

By answering the following couple of questions, this should get you moving:

Ø Who are you? Introvert/Extrovert?

Ø What makes you unique?

Ø What do you enjoy doing?

Ø What are you passionate about?

Ø Do you have many real, close friends?

Ø Are you a family person?

Ø Where can you see yourself in 2 year time?

Ø Where would you like to be in 5 year time?

Ø What are your feelings toward the opposite sex?

Ø Would you prefer to do some travelling, or more, if any?

Ø How are you doing financially?

Ø Do you mind sharing?

Ø Do you enjoy children?

Ø When do you feel your very best?

Ø What do you usually do when time just passes by without you even noticing it?

Ø Do you trust your intuition/gut feeling/instinct? If ever?

Ø What is most important to you? Yourself or Your friends?

Ø Do you ever care what others think, feel and say about you?

Ø Can you hold resentment toward someone for very long or do you just simply forgive, forget and move on?

Ø Have you had any not-so-good relationships in the past?

Ø Are you still angry with or upset with someone?

Ø Are you ready for commitment?

Ø Would you prefer just dating and perhaps just hanging around without the real need to commit for ‘ever’?

Ø Is there any other concern (that may have arisen) you may have while reading and going through the above questions?

What I would suggest it that you strive for balance rather than perfection.

Most people live in a black-and-white world where they think that they’re either a volunteer with no life of their own, or just a materialistic, achievement-oriented person who doesn’t care to make a difference. Don’t fall into this trap. Life is a balance between giving and receiving, between taking care of yourself and taking care of others.

Don't postpone your happiness. I call this the “when I (fill in the blank), I will be happy” syndrome. The reality is happiness isn’t something to be acquired in the future. You are either happy now or not; “then” never arrives. Living & striving for “then” results in a constant state of unhappiness. If you can’t be happy now, you most certainly will not be happy later. NOW is the only time you have to be happy!

Also, please, be open, there is never written that you (as you put it in your very own words) - to find out later your life is now on the wrong course.

Where is this written this is going to be the case?

SHOW ME THE PROOF!!!

To close it, I would like to end on a less (!?) significant note:

Being comfortable not knowing everything is one of the greatest gifts we can give ourselves. We'll never know everything and we don't have to! Ah, what a relief! Learning to be open to all the possibilities that life has to offer us takes practice. Often, we couldn't have even dreamed up the blessings that we deserve. In order to receive them, we must be fully willing and open to surrender our expectations. Sometimes we don't even know that we're closed off.  It can be as simple as getting stuck in a rut.  

When this feeling happens, we have to shift gears and try something new. With newness comes change, and often inspiration and guidance to our truest and most meaningful path. A visual representation of this that I like is to remove the fences (or sometimes massive stone walls) that have been built up around our minds. The walls come in the form of expectations, silly excuses and judgement. Let those walls crumble! Be open to WONDER.  

Go with the flow

Be open minded

Find a reason / purpose

And believe me – you will get there. Sooner or later, you will get there!! J how is that for the change?!?

Thank you for reading!!