Whose life are you living: your own or your........

Whose life are you living: your own or your........

Tomorrow’s topic could be: whose life are you living your own or your........

peers i.e. if they get engaged do you find yourself feeling like you have to keep pace, with their life choices only to find out later your life is now on the wrong course because panic struck you years earlier about your own life so you copied them. So whose life are you living: yours or somebody else's?

Recently I have asked a friend of mine I encountered to challenge me and pick a topic for me to write about. And my new friend was willing and kind enough to oblige! J The above paragraph is what he came up with and I took the bull by the horns and jumped on the wagon and begin my writing and typing away…..

Here is what my solution to his posing question/statement sounds like:

THIS Topic is so common that every single one of us has been there and done that at least once!

First and foremost, you are not alone and we all have gone through this stage of life. And the people after us will feel the same ‘stuckness’, too.

So let us throw the worry habit right out of the window…… shall we?

How to go about solving this challenge?

The main and the most important point in understanding the whole issue is by beginning to get to know yourself.

Yes, Yourself! J

If you don't know who you are, how can you find someone to love you as you are?

Consider this: Just only the fact that you have ‘this’ sitting on your mind must have obviously tell you that you may be doing something that you are either not fully committed to doing, not sure of, not really willing to go full on.

By answering the following couple of questions, this should get you moving:

Ø Who are you? Introvert/Extrovert?

Ø What makes you unique?

Ø What do you enjoy doing?

Ø What are you passionate about?

Ø Do you have many real, close friends?

Ø Are you a family person?

Ø Where can you see yourself in 2 year time?

Ø Where would you like to be in 5 year time?

Ø What are your feelings toward the opposite sex?

Ø Would you prefer to do some travelling, or more, if any?

Ø How are you doing financially?

Ø Do you mind sharing?

Ø Do you enjoy children?

Ø When do you feel your very best?

Ø What do you usually do when time just passes by without you even noticing it?

Ø Do you trust your intuition/gut feeling/instinct? If ever?

Ø What is most important to you? Yourself or Your friends?

Ø Do you ever care what others think, feel and say about you?

Ø Can you hold resentment toward someone for very long or do you just simply forgive, forget and move on?

Ø Have you had any not-so-good relationships in the past?

Ø Are you still angry with or upset with someone?

Ø Are you ready for commitment?

Ø Would you prefer just dating and perhaps just hanging around without the real need to commit for ‘ever’?

Ø Is there any other concern (that may have arisen) you may have while reading and going through the above questions?

What I would suggest it that you strive for balance rather than perfection.

Most people live in a black-and-white world where they think that they’re either a volunteer with no life of their own, or just a materialistic, achievement-oriented person who doesn’t care to make a difference. Don’t fall into this trap. Life is a balance between giving and receiving, between taking care of yourself and taking care of others.

Don't postpone your happiness. I call this the “when I (fill in the blank), I will be happy” syndrome. The reality is happiness isn’t something to be acquired in the future. You are either happy now or not; “then” never arrives. Living & striving for “then” results in a constant state of unhappiness. If you can’t be happy now, you most certainly will not be happy later. NOW is the only time you have to be happy!

Also, please, be open, there is never written that you (as you put it in your very own words) - to find out later your life is now on the wrong course.

Where is this written this is going to be the case?

SHOW ME THE PROOF!!!

To close it, I would like to end on a less (!?) significant note:

Being comfortable not knowing everything is one of the greatest gifts we can give ourselves. We'll never know everything and we don't have to! Ah, what a relief! Learning to be open to all the possibilities that life has to offer us takes practice. Often, we couldn't have even dreamed up the blessings that we deserve. In order to receive them, we must be fully willing and open to surrender our expectations. Sometimes we don't even know that we're closed off.  It can be as simple as getting stuck in a rut.  

When this feeling happens, we have to shift gears and try something new. With newness comes change, and often inspiration and guidance to our truest and most meaningful path. A visual representation of this that I like is to remove the fences (or sometimes massive stone walls) that have been built up around our minds. The walls come in the form of expectations, silly excuses and judgement. Let those walls crumble! Be open to WONDER.  

Go with the flow

Be open minded

Find a reason / purpose

And believe me – you will get there. Sooner or later, you will get there!! J how is that for the change?!?

Thank you for reading!!

"Love - The joy of winning compared with the agony of defeat"

"Love - The joy of winning compared with the agony of defeat"

Love not only means love between persons, it also includes the love of life and living life. It is about winning and losing love in the struggle of life with all things, relationships, work, school, sport, friends.

Recently I have asked a friend of mine I encountered to challenge me and pick a topic for me to write about. And my new friend was willing and kind enough to oblige! J The above paragraph is what he came up with and I took the bull by the horns and jumped on the wagon and begin my writing and typing away…..

Here is what my solution to his posing question/statement sounds like:

Love.

Love is the greatest power ever known to men. Right next to the gratitude and being grateful and appreciative.

Love, feeling love, being in love, appreciation, compassion, affection and adoration and passion (notice: I am NOT speaking of ‘falling in love’ which is a subject to further discussion later on) is a powerful emotional state and a feeling. It is actually so powerful that one can turn into a genius under certain circumstances and conditions.

It is also mysterious in its very own profound way in relation to brain chemicals which I am not going to be describing here, though.

My friend strictly stressed and pointed out to me that what he meant was not talking ‘only’ about the love that blossoms between lovers, etc. but also love that reaches out as far as to loving & living an enjoyable life, to ‘things’ such as: work situation, school arrangement / education / learning / studying, sport / fitness activities, friends and other relationships.

It IS a broad subject in itself and surely worth diving deep down into! J

Although I myself am still on one of those journeys of mine, I am bold and brave enough to do just that, too!!

In terms of love, the kind that 2 persons feel toward one another, or a mother feels towards her baby, a father toward his son/daughter, parents toward each other, grandparents, neighbours, co-workers, colleges, teacher – student relationship, athlete – coach, friends and vice versa, etc. etc., we should be meaning ‘an unconditional love’.

It is a great feeling to have succeeded in this very important part of every person’s life, of course. Oh, what a sweet melody that is!! J

However, the real and raw learning and growing begins when it is not working as we would prefer it to have! And right here it is where I would love for you to pay an attention!! 100% attention, that is! 

It is what we are becoming and who we are when and while things fall apart, when relationships do not work, when we feel lonely, when we are alone in our own misery, there is no one to give a hug to and be hugged in return, no one really to touch, feel, cry our heart out to, no one to be our listening ear, the shoulder to lean on, … ! 

Then, and only at those times, by examining our life, by working on ourselves, we have been shaping ourselves into better human beings and the organic & pure appreciation of love (when none is present at the moment!) occurs. We are being grateful of every single little simple thing that is being thrown in on our path through the journey called Life.

By Giving and Receiving Love, by Becoming Grateful we – us – at the same time are fulfilling our purpose and that is the main reason – WHY WE ARE HERE….

So, yes, love in its very best beauty is nice. No, not nice. Actually, It is a wonderful, amazing, breath-taking, mind-blowing, magnificent, spec-ta-cu-lar, awesome, great,…  experience.

Nevertheless, I, myself, would not, personally, rule out the ‘shadowy’ parts of love out of question just yet! Why not?, you ask? Well, that is easy – by experiencing the hard bits, the challenging, the difficult and the tougher ones ….

…. You are becoming a best version of yourself (as humanly possible!) => you are influencing people around you that surround you => a whole planet benefits at the end, eventually, also! J

Sometimes the bad things that happen in our lives put us directly on the path to the best things that will ever happen to us.

Makes sense? Good!

We are growing from every aspect and in every way (every day!): mentally, physically, spiritually…

What not a better / useful reason but that one?

What not a better task to be called for to do and fulfil?

What not a better reason to wake up every single each day and go after it AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN  if need to be !!

It can be applied to anything, from any type / kind of relationships to practically every part of your life.

You name it! It has its own price tag!

Every act of kindness on your part is a boost to your own immune system.

Everyone is a mirror of you. What do you see in the reflection?

To close it, I would like to end on a less (!?) significant note:

Being comfortable not knowing everything is one of the greatest gifts we can give ourselves. We'll never know everything and we don't have to! Ah, what a relief! Learning to be open to all the possibilities that life has to offer us takes practice. Often, we couldn't have even dreamed up the blessings that we deserve. In order to receive them, we must be fully willing and open to surrender our expectations. Sometimes we don't even know that we're closed off.  It can be as simple as getting stuck in a rut.  

When this feeling happens, we have to shift gears and try something new. With newness comes change, and often inspiration and guidance to our truest and most meaningful path. A visual representation of this that I like is to remove the fences (or sometimes massive stone walls) that have been built up around our minds. The walls come in the form of expectations, silly excuses and judgement. Let those walls crumble! Be open to WONDER.  

So, what do you think now?

What is your take on?

It is what you make of it!

Let us start a love revolution (sort of) by loving each and every one of us …………………

“You can complain because roses have thorns, or you can rejoice because thorns have roses.” --Tom Wilson 

Thank you!!

What have you been waiting for?!? If not NOW, When?!?

What have you been waiting for?!?

If not NOW, When?!?

“We’re here to live, to love, to laugh, to learn, and to leave a legacy.” – Stephen Covey

Seriously now, really.

What have you been thinking about?

What have you been doing?!?

What are you thinking about?

What are you doing?

What have you been waiting for?!

What are you waiting for?

There is no better time but NOW !!

Most of us take every week, every month, every year, every hour, every moment, every day, every minute for granted.

Come to think of it, we even take people, friends, food and meals, good fortunate, our relationships, our positions and jobs, our circumstances, our homes/houses, our cars, our places, etc. etc. for granted.

Why is that?

Have we forgotten to be grateful?

Have we forgotten to appreciate the little & simple things in life that have been on offer?

All we have got to do is not take anything for granted and appreciate every moment that has been given to us.

Meet as many people as you can, experience as many culture, food as you can, go to as many places as you possibly can.

You are still breathing. Get back in to a game!

You are still in the playing field. Get out there!

Do not waste your time.

Do not waste your life.

Enjoy every single moment.

Every each one of them.

Never, never, never, never, EVER, never GIVE up !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SHAME

SHAME

Vulnerability

Males vs Females

Women in our today’s society must (!) be perceived as ‘perfect’ in every way.

Men in our today’s society must not (!) be perceived as ‘weak’ in any way.

Where does this going to lead/take us?

Attitude makes all the difference.

There is a difference between Vulnerability and Shame.

vulnerability  

Web definitions the state of being vulnerable or exposed; "his vulnerability to litigation"; "his exposure to ridicule".

shame

Noun A painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by the consciousness of wrong or foolish behaviour.

Verb (of a person, action, or situation) Make (someone) feel ashamed: "I shamed him into giving some away".

Vulnerability

Ø Vulnerability is not a weakness. It is human to be and to feel vulnerable.  

Ø It is showing our true face to others and not be ashamed of who we are, what we feel.

Ø There can be no vulnerability without the risk.

Ø You show your vulnerability through relationships, and those feelings are your soft spot.

Ø It is revealing us in our nakedness, our misery, our nothingness, our mortality, our mutability.

Ø The vulnerability is the greatest strength a person can have.

Ø It shows you are strong enough to care.

Ø To grow up is to accept vulnerability.

Ø To be alive is to be vulnerable.

Shame

ü How can one blush for what one adores?

ü Nature soaks every evil with either fear or shame.

ü Once we realize that imperfect understanding is the human condition there is no shame in being wrong, only in failing to correct our mistakes.

ü The only shame is to have none.

ü Hard work without talent is a shame, but talent without hard work is a tragedy.

ü Honour and shame from no condition rise. Act well your part: there all the honour lies.

ü What makes the pain we feel from shame and jealousy so cutting is that vanity can give us no assistance in bearing them.

ü Being ignorant is not so much a shame, as being unwilling to learn.

ü Whatever if begun in anger ends in shame.

There is no need to be and feel ashamed of anything. Feel free to be vulnerable.

Just Get On With It……

Please, take a moment and think of today’s very significant topic.

What are your take away points on this subject?

Any advice you would provide?

Any lessons gained?

Any experiences of your own?

Also, please, share, comment & leave a feedback!

Much appreciated!! J